Tuesday, February 2, 2016
@ 5:54 PM | 0 Shhhh . .
I'm a crazy bitch ~
Horrible week before CNY start as usually the family just can't start it without dramas. Unlucky is again as usual the target regardless I have or not done a thing. They just got a sick ass mind that i can't help to move as far away from them as possible. Sigh...
Moving home was a big big challenge, mainly coming from timo which technically he is not accepting that I wanna move back. Still i guess it would much of a solution given that his mum monitors and gumble about me more than my family would. Giving the doubt that she is concern but those words that she said sounds kinda personal attack. Don't understand what she is actually thinking but my guess was that she is so dam afraid that i would take away her precious son which frankly I'm not so eager to do that and i won't. You people are a family, logically how the hell am i gonna kidnap your son away. Haha!
I said something very stupid lately which I feel like slapping myself for it. Can't imagine i would say that i wanted a lifetime commitment from someone whom I'm pretty sure won't commit to anyone. I must be out of my mind to think that things might turn out as how i felt tho even after so long, I'm still pretty sure that he is one. Don't have a logical sense to it but lets say life don't always have a perfect answer.
Commitment seems to sound like a big word to many people but my definition of commitment is pretty just going through hardship together till death tears each other apart. I don't want a perfect and boring guy whom provide me everything. I want a someone who will still love me and will return home when tomorrow comes! Regardless if today happen that either one of us meet someone else or attempted to cheat, of cause my bottom line is that no sickness would be brought upon me. Because till this day i have not witness a total relationship or marriage.
Psychologically we are human, we will always be curious about everything and wanna try out something else, totally undeniable. But as long a someone whom still return to love and take care of me and the family if we happen to have one, everything else just doesn't matter. As i would know that i have something that no one else could take away which is the commitment from my partner that they won't.
