Friday, February 24, 2012
@ 11:51 AM | 0 Shhhh . .
Drunker!
~ Today was a very long day tho time passes fast. I did a lot of explaining and terming out with Sephi. I really don't know how to explain myself but i know both of our culture are very different. I have always been alone most of the time ever since i was young, everyone pampers me a lot but they just couldn't give me time. I spend time at home watch American's movie, ordering maids around cause i'm too bored, go down my block trying to make friends with everyone else. At point to point i change and adapt to different groups of people just to feel normal. I do envy kids that are worries free and not like going KTV with they parents and experience so much of adults life since young. I have seen a lot thought out my years and that's what makes me think a lot and act differently. I turn out to be a wild child that is living in my own world. The best that i could do was to believe in myself and my instinct. I know i don't have good attitude towards others and i'm defensive most of the time. I'm just afraid to share my world with others, i can change slowly for someone but i never allow anyone to enter my world. I want someone to prove to me that they are able to walk the road with me but no one have ever prove so even Sephi. It was funny when he told me that he know he was a jerk. I know he wasn't deep down in him, he wanna to play and all Libra are playful. Haha! I won't and couldn't stop him from finding what he want so i hope that he won't pursuit me to stop what i want. I rather feel the pain then to lose my faith. Got some drunk customer today, almost feel like whacking that guy but i didn't as he is Thomas's friend. Manage to pull myself back as i don't want to make thing look bad. My temper did control quite a lot as compared to last time and i'm glad. I did change quite a lot tho it's not obvious changes. I stopped biting my nails, dressed slightly more proper most of the time and a little more discipline and widen my thoughts too. I'm not easy to be understood but if you use your heart i will open up more of myself which i hide. That all for today. Gonna head to bed as tomorrow will be another day (:
